After Effects

In familiar arms, she nestled. His warmth embraced her, soothing her frayed nerves as the gaze from his unsure eyes caressed her. His soul leaped out to comfort hers, but not quite. A fear gripped him. A fear that had taken residence within his very conscious: the fear she wouldn’t be enough. The fear that she would never make him as happy as she thought she could. That he would always wonder what it would be like to have someone else. Someone different. Someone better. Or maybe have no one at all. He was perfectly happy as he was; he didn’t need anyone. But then, she wasn’t just anyone, was she? And with that thought, here he was again, holding her in the same dark corridor; the usual passionate exclamations replaced by her quiet sobs.Untitled

God knew she deserved more: he’d put her through enough. Human beings have an almost uncanny tendency to ask for precisely that which is not good for them. In this instance, he could not let her have it. It would just not do. She believed in him much more than she should. She did not trust him completely anymore(he didn’t give her much reason to) but she would still do what any good woman would – fight the world for the man she loved. It was just her misfortune that this very man could probably never love her back. The worst part was that it wasn’t her. It was never her. She was beautiful, clever, compassionate, understanding…everything a man could ever ask for. She had been there for him at a time when no one else was. When he had fallen apart at the hands of the world, she had picked up all the pieces and helped stick them back together. She had mended every crack, every crevice, painstakingly. Yes, she had been a handful herself, but that is how it is with every relationship: compromises must be made on both sides. He had allowed the inconveniences she had caused him to overshadow the happiness and reason she had brought back in his life. That one impulse broke something that could never be mended again. He would never feel the same way about her again.

Sensing his discomfort, she lifted her head from its sanctuary in his arms and looked at him. Her large eyes glistened as she gazed at him questioningly; her face so lovely he doubted he’d ever forget it even if he tried. She asked him if they were going to be okay. He replied with a nod and kissed her forehead softly, pulling her closer, wondering if he would ever have the courage to tell her the truth.



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